Konsept -
Guided by shadows, my body limp in the stall
Am I dead or just dreaming seeing my life from the sight of god?
The void's been entered tibetan scriptures unnoticed
just floating through hell on earth through the curse of chemical doses.
Numb to emotion I'm jaded beyond salvation,
degraded faded and hating the face of these mental patients.
Mentally vacant for centuries I've been chained
to this worthless body of bones in a state of morbid decay.
Hearing her say that she never loved me repeatedly
playing this broken record and swallowing what she's feeding me.
I taste the hatred like vinegar in my chiva
and see her face in the static that gathers thru my receiver.
Hiding beneath the appearance of barely functioning
punching holes in the wall until my fists are bloody and crumbling.
Stumble thru life with no angels over my shoulders
just apparitions that whisper "The end is constantly closer..."
Lost in the notes of depressive psycho-analysis
Auto-biodegradable flesh that's covered in calluses.
Wandering houses still haunted by her familiar
I feel the chill in the air but I can't explain why I killed her.
Still burning candles and laughing at my reflection
My sociopathic mind can't be cured by anti-depressants.
If life's a test then I failed the finals, no question
My suicide wasn't planned but I pulled it off with perfection.
Hockeymask -
So depressed, all I ever do is go to bed,
wake up in a bad mood 'cause I overslept,
no way to cope with stress, so cold and tense,
hopeless mess, need support but there's noone left.
My soul is dead, I'm emotionless,
alcohol and opiates are my only friends.
I don't feel alive, it's hard to really try,
I should probably get abilify pills perscribed.
Can't tell the difference between dreams and what's really life,
it all seems like scenes from vanilla sky.
The guilt we hide always kills the pride,
the look she had in her willing eyes is still inside my filthy mind.
This nightmare feels like an eternity,
trying to get my mind clear is still of no concern to me.
I don't even think that therapy would really help,
I just talked to my ex-girlfriend and she told me to go kill myself.